Continued from page 1Which leads me nicely to my next topic: How to treat your guest speaker. (A clearly self-serving discussion, but, what the hell.) Most of your guest speakers will drive at least an hour each way, frequently more and will spend two hours at your meeting in exchange for anything from a certificate made on someone's home computer to gas money. I usually get a little more than this (especially if I leave town), but sometimes, like for new clubs trying to bring in members, I might get less. Yes, I enjoy speaking very much as is the case with most speakers, but the bottom line is that we are doing you a very nice turn and should be treated accordingly. Here are some guidelines:
* If there is any travel involved, make certain that plans are made in advance and that you call the speaker a few days before the meeting just to shore up any final details. If someone is to pick up the speaker, make certain that they are on time and know what the speaker looks like.
* Find out what equipment the speaker may need and make certain that if you have agreed to provide anything that it is provided and in good shape. I can't tell you some of the things that clubs have passed off as projection screens in the past. Oy. Also, make certain that your sound system helps the speaker be understood and does not hinder and make certain that, if slides of a film is to be shown, that the room darkens and is configured so that everybody can see the screen.
* Make certain that your members observe the utmost courtesy while the speaker is speaking. Personally, obnoxious people don't bother me too much as I am not easily overpowered, but it embarrasses other members of your club and may detract from their enjoyment of the presentation. I had an "interesting" experience at one of my very favorite bird clubs, from which we learned a great deal. In hindsight, I thought of a lot of great one-liners to use next time someone won't shut up, so watch out.
* Provide unlimited beverages. I don't expect to be fed (although it's nice to have dinner with the Board, or committee chairs, or selected members), but if I want to drink 10 diet cokes, they should be provided. Decaffeinated is okay if you don't want me to talk too fast. I recently spoke at a club where the president stood there and sponged free behavioral advice while I fished through my pockets for change for the soda machine.
* Speaking of free advice, use common sense. I used to practice law and have, on more than one occasion been asked for free advice at seminars. Once, I was even embroiled in a debate between political factions and asked to decide who was "right". C'mon. On the other hand, after inviting me to speak at her club, a member emailed me and asked if I wouldn't mind looking something over for her and that she would understand if I said that I would prefer not to. A bad way and a good way to approach the same situation.
* Stupid as they are, I like those goofy imitation walnut plaques. We all love acknowledgement and a good speaker is more likely to return if they feel appreciated, and having something on their wall that says how much you appreciate them is a good reminder.
* The person that introduces the speaker should really know their name and the topic of their presentation. Call me crazy, if you will, but I was once introduced by the wrong name, as the founder of the Bird Rescue Center (it's the Parrot Placement Center) and that I was going to show slides of Hyacinth macaws in the rainforest. Of course, Hyacinth macaws don't live in the rainforest, a fact which I immediately mentioned. She'll get it right next time.
Now, let's talk politics. My suggestion: stop talking politics. An organized discussion of issues that effect birds or the club or it's policies is great, but the petty gossip and factionalization is silly and useless. If you don't like the way something is being done, read the by-laws and see how it can be changed. If you don't like an officer, run against 'em. If you don't like a club, join another one. But sniping at each other all day is useless.
As for bird politics, breeder oriented clubs do have a way of alienating the hobbyist and/or non-AFA member. Personally, I like a lot of what the AFA does and stands for. I also don't like some of it. I don't think this makes me a bad person or even too far from the norm, yet some of these clubs have a real "take it or leave it" attitude that could reduce their reach. Bird clubs shouldn't be political action committees. You should do your best to appeal to the widest range of avian interests. If you want to have an AFA/breeder group within the club, or an African Grey owner's group or a Gay and Lesbian Scarlet macaw behavioral theorists group, great, but at the club level, the common denominator should be birds, just birds.
Well, that's about it. I know I had a lot to say but I just hope that it is received in the spirit that it was intended, which is to make us all more effective in helping the birds that we all love so much.
Your friend,
Layne
P.S. I almost forgot. You might want to start on time every once in a while. If you're 45 minutes late and your speaker has a 2 hour drive home, their presentation might spontaneously become very, very short.
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